A few months ago, I blogged about stalking and how that experience affected me personally. I received countless unwelcome texts from a former friend, who used the “Spoof” application to continue to gain access to my phone number, despite my efforts to stop them from contacting me. These repeated unwanted texts and phone calls weren’t just signs of stalking, but of digital abuse as well. Digital abuse is “the use of technologies such as texting and social networking to bully, harass, stalk or intimidate” –loveisrespect.org.
Abuse of any kind is not about love, but based on power and control. When does that power and control turn into risky situations that could potentially stay with an individual forever? You might be wondering where I’m going with this. I’m talking about how peer pressure and digital dating abuse can transition to sexting. Sexting is the sending of nude, seminude, or suggestive pictures via text messaging. “Sexting can also have legal consequences. Any nude photos or video of someone under 18 could be considered child pornography, which is always illegal. Even if whoever sent the image did so willingly, the recipient can still get in a lot of trouble” –loveisrepect.org.
So how can digital abuse and sexting go hand in hand? One example is numerous texts by a partner pressuring their significant other to send pictures that are nude, semi-nude or suggestive. The partner being pressured might start to feel like they don’t have a choice to say no; besides their partner promised not to show any one and maybe they’ve even sent pictures of themselves too. So what’s the harm? Unfortunately, the internet is forever. Once a digital copy of something has been created it is very hard to delete. When STAR community educators go in to the middle and high schools to talk about sexting we tell youth that “If you wouldn’t want your grandma to see it, just don’t send it!”
We talk to our youth about driving safety, athletic safety, and yes, we even talk to them about safe sex, but what do we teach them about digital safety? What are some restrictions and guidelines you have for your youth? Are there time limits? Do you know who all their Facebook friends are and have you met them? Are there ways to monitor their phone use? Share with us how you talk with your youth about digital abuse. Check out these great sites for digital abuse campaigns and for information to help talk with the youth in your life: www.loveisrespect.org www.athinline.org. Click here for facts as well as interactive quizzes to help ensure digital safety.
Join us next month as, Community Educator, Chelsie, talks about bullying behavior.
Until next time,
Danielle
Community Educator
Standing Together Against Rape
STAR Alaska Blog 